You Can’t Live in Two Homes at the Same Time

by Keisha Bell-Celestand, LPC-S

So many of us are trying to live in two homes at once—not physically, but mentally and emotionally.

We say we want to move forward. We say we’re ready for a fresh start. But the truth is, many of us are still mentally unpacking and sitting in the old house—clinging to memories, habits, and pain that no longer serve us. We find ourselves tethered to a past that we haven’t truly left behind.

Think of it like this: when you move from one house to another, you don’t bring everything with you. You sort through your belongings. You pack the items that are still in good condition—things that are useful, meaningful, and aligned with your new space. But you also throw things away: broken electronics, torn furniture, outdated junk that no longer fits your new life. You leave it behind because it’s no longer helpful.

But emotionally? Spiritually? Many of us pack everything—even the trash. We carry old wounds, toxic behaviors, and outdated beliefs into new spaces—new relationships, new jobs, new opportunities—because letting go feels scary. Sometimes, the things we should have left behind once brought us comfort. Or maybe we believe we might still need them someday. So we bring them along, hoping they’ll somehow fit into our future.

Here’s the truth: You cannot live in two homes at the same time. You cannot truly move forward if you're still emotionally rooted in a space that no longer serves you.

Maybe you grew up in a home where yelling was the only form of communication. That might’ve been "normal" in that old space. But if you carry that behavior into your new relationships, you’re not building something new—you’re just redecorating the old dysfunction.

Now, not everything from the past is trash. Some things are worth keeping. Maybe your mom taught you how to cook a beautiful Sunday dinner—keep that. That’s a memory and skill rooted in love. But if she also taught you that love means controlling others or tolerating disrespect, that’s not something you want to bring into your new space. That stays behind.

Some things can’t be fixed. Some things shouldn’t be fixed.

Trying to revive a broken TV just because you’ve had it for years isn’t practical. The same goes for emotional baggage. Sometimes, it’s simply time to let go.

If you’re still tied to that old home—the pain, the dysfunction, the outdated beliefs—you’ll only get so far before that tether yanks you back or keeps you stuck in place.

Healing requires releasing. Growth demands space.

You deserve to live fully in your new home, your new chapter, your present life.

Don’t cheat yourself by straddling the past and the present.

Let go of what no longer serves you and allow yourself the freedom to build something better.

You can’t live in two homes at the same time.

Choose the one that’s nourishing your future.

Are You Ready to Move Forward?

Letting go is hard—but you don’t have to do it alone.

If you're ready to stop living in two spaces and finally find peace in the present, Celestand Counseling is here to support your journey forward.

Start today—your new beginning is just one step away.

www.celestandcounseling.com/contact